photo credit: The Wrap
I often hear parents voice concerns about their child’s “mis-behavior,” but then yell and say mean things at their children in the same 50-minute session (and most likely at home every single day). Do you ever experience this in your practice?
This shameproof parenting principle, by Mercedes Samudio, was a great reminder for me to check my own biases, practice empathy, and get back to serving this beautiful family in front of me. Especially as a completely imperfect parent myself, I admit my own need for help and try the best I can to meet parents where they are, as a fellow sojourner trying to figure this out. In times like these (always time for a music break!!) I’ve found attachment-based language to be a helpful resource and launchpad for dialogue around parenting, raising awareness, and child development.
Here’s a list of three resources that I’ve found helpful so far during the second year of my LPCC track (many thanks to my supervisor and colleagues!!), use them however you like and up that attachment game today!!
- Circle of Security (3 short animations, 4 min. each, super helpful!!!)
- Nurturing Resilience (rich material, lots of applications, main point is about coping/regulation)
- Beyond Logic, Consequences, & Control (Heather T. Forbes LCSW, trauma-informed model; while it’s not attachment language per se, I’d still consider it a helpful voice in the conversation, especially for families on the adoption/permanency spectrum; super-raw un-edited and un-refined basic main point is kids respond either from “fear or love”)
BONUS: this video on parenting/coaching from Dr. Becky Baily was not only entertaining and well-produced, but a powerful tool for helping parents reflect on their own journey as kids and provides a model for parents as they struggle with their response to their kids’ dysregulation).
What are some resources around attachment that you’ve found helpful in your practice?
I’d love to hear from you!